Lena Chen

Here are some snapshots from last month’s second annual...

Wed, 11 Apr 2012 20:53:42 +0200

Here are some snapshots from last month’s second annual Sex, Love, & Dating Conference at Rutgers University :) Since I had a big gap between my two workshops, I took the opportunity to sit down and chat with some really lovely students.

Below are the workshop descriptions - I’m becoming bored of talking about the hook-up culture, to be honest. After writing my thesis on the topic and blogging at length about it, it seems like I’ve learned all that I can. That said, I’m thinking of developing the slut-shaming workshop into a full-length talk for next year…

Hooking Up & Getting Down: The State of Casual Sex & the College Romance

Half a century after the sexual revolution, premarital sex is today the norm, and social conservatives lament the rise of the so-called hook-up culture. What does dating in college look like today? Are abstinence advocates onto something when they warn that casual sex has effectively killed romance? Will fooling around before marriage endanger your future marital bliss — or even make you less likely to marry? What if you want to opt out of hooking up altogether? Part-interactive workshop, part conversation, this talk takes a humorous look at dating through the ages and encourages audience members to explore modern courtship through their personal experiences. Come prepared to share your opinions and questions on topics like first-date sex, consent, peer pressure, and dating rules.

Slut Walks, Walks Of Shame, & Sexual Double Standards

Hussy. Whore. Harlot. Tramp. “Slut-shaming” may be a modern term but the stigmatization of women’s sexuality has a rich cultural history. The fear of social reprisal can affect everything from the way we dress to how we communicate with our sexual partners and peers. In a society with supposed sexual freedom, how does slut-shaming reinforce existing gendered norms and threaten young people’s identity and emotional well-being through cyber bullying and real-world harassment? How does the “slut” label limit our ability to vocalize our desires or express ourselves, and how are double standards stratified by race, class, and religion? Most importantly, is there a way to reappropriate the term “slut” and reclaim it in the name of sexual liberation? This talk discusses the speaker’s personal experiences with “slut-shaming”, the “fallen woman” as a social construct, and the ways these stereotypes manifest themselves in pop culture and in our everyday lives.

In the latest episode of Sexy Times, I give advice to girls who...

Thu, 05 Apr 2012 13:00:09 +0200

In the latest episode of Sexy Times, I give advice to girls who aren’t quite ready to come out yet. Do you have an obligation to tell your friends and family about your sexual orientation? What happens if you aren’t ready yet? Watch the above video and check out the past editions of the Sexy Times series over at gURL.com.

Headed to California for Sex:Tech & Pomona College event

Sat, 31 Mar 2012 21:08:00 +0200

Headed to California for Sex:Tech & Pomona College event:

Hey guys! I’m headed to San Francisco to attend Sex:Tech, the 5th Annual Isis Conference on New Media, Youth, & Sexual Health, where I’ll be speaking on a panel about online intimacy and relationships. Then I’ll be in Los Angeles from April 3rd to 6th to do an event at Pomona College. It’ll be a hectic week of work and travel, but I’m hoping to see both of my parents and some friends while in town. I’m going to try to make it back to California at least one more time (when I don’t have any professional obligations) before I make the big move to Berlin. And maybe next time, I can bring the two boys?

Below is the info on the two events :)

xoxosms: Authentic Relationships and Online Identities
11:30am, Monday, April 2nd at Stanford Court Renaissance in San Francisco, CA

How do we navigate online identities and relationships? Can you really “know” someone you’ve never met? Is it safe to form relationships online? Enjoy a film screening of “xoxosms”, a new short documentary by Nancy Schwartzman that follows two star-crossed lovers in the digital age. Following the screening, we’ll discuss the idea of “digital intimacy”, and the authentic and healthy relationships to be found and nurtured online. Featuring Nancy Schwartzman (Filmmaker and The Line Campaign), Cory Silverberg (sexuality.about.com and ISIS Board Member), Heather Corinna (Scarleteen), and Lena Chen (Sex and the Ivy).

Writing Sex Positively: A Discussion with Lena Chen
7pm, Thursday, April 5th at Pomona College in Claremont, CA

What is sex-positive writing, and at which point does it become a political act? How has the feminist or sex-positive blog-o-sphere reshaped social activism and cultural criticism? Is the Internet an effective tool for social change or does it merely maintain the status quo and replicate offline power structures? In a moderated conversation, Lena Chen, a “reluctant sexpert, a feminist and queer advocate, and a walking case study on bad publicity”, will discuss her career as a blogger, speaker, media commentator, and activist. She’ll answer questions about the future of new media and publishing, professional options for feminists and progressives, and the pros and cons of working within the non-profit industrial complex. RSVP for the event on Facebook.

My Sex In The Digital Age panel was really fun/funny. (Perhaps...

Mon, 19 Mar 2012 19:06:15 +0100

My Sex In The Digital Age panel was really fun/funny. (Perhaps to be expected when one is on the same panel as the person who first broke the story of their sex scandal, hah.)

If you couldn’t make my #digitalsex panel, check out coverage from NOW Toronto and The Daily Texan (or on Twitter).

It’s the debut of Sexy Times, my new web series airing weekly on...

Fri, 09 Mar 2012 23:26:55 +0100

It’s the debut of Sexy Times, my new web series airing weekly on Alloy Digital’s gURL.com! So I filmed this way back in the fall of 2011 - and while I think the opening credits and overall editing are rocking and SO worth the pain, I remember a brutal shoot in which I sweat like a pig and thought, “These hot lights rival Bikram yoga in intensity.” Glad that part of the ordeal stayed on the cutting room floor …

Check out episode numero uno (above) on what to do when you want to use a condom but your partner doesn’t, let me know what you think (pretty please!), and keep an eye out on a new clip every Friday with some handy sex and relationship tips.

Hint hint: gURL.com’s target demo is younger girls and teens, but I like to think that I give all-ages advice ;)

Going To Austin For SXSW?

Mon, 05 Mar 2012 20:19:24 +0100

Going To Austin For SXSW?:

Catch me at this SXSW Interactive panel next week … I arrive in town this Wednesday and will be there for six days. *Very* excited to see Austin!

SEX IN THE DIGITAL AGE
Monday, March 12 12:30PM - 1:30PM
Driskill Hotel - Driskill Ballroom

As the Internet has become an increasingly integral part of our daily lives, it’s transformed virtually everything about how we live—from how we communicate with friends and family, how we get our jobs done, and, yes, how we flirt, find lovers, and explore our sexuality. In many ways, this evolution has been a positive one, bringing us amazing new ways to connect with the rest of the world, but it’s also had some unforeseen consequences. Just over a decade ago, when the country was reeling from the aftermath of the Lewinsky scandal, who could have imagined that one day a congressman would be forced to resign from his post after a scandal that involved no sex, no illicit meetings—in fact, nothing more than some online flirting and a few ill advised sexts?

Sex in the Digital Age examines how the Internet has transformed our relationship to sexuality: what it’s given us, what it’s taken away, and how it’s transformed our ideas and expectations about how our friends, lovers, and public figures can—and should—behave.

Missed our conversation about online love, digital intimacy and...

Fri, 24 Feb 2012 00:00:00 +0100

Missed our conversation about online love, digital intimacy and the future of dating? You can check out the best bits from the XOXOSMS Valentine’s premiere on Vimeo (or on Ustream for the full video from our livestream).

P.S. For press coverage of the event, check out this article on NYU Local.

High fashion, minus the labels | CNN.com

Sun, 19 Feb 2012 15:00:06 +0100

High fashion, minus the labels | CNN.com:

Here’s a quick read for your lazy long weekend! A CNN piece I was quoted in:

Twenty-year-old, 6-foot-1 Andrej Pejic is a model for success: a women’s size 2 or 4; angular cheekbones; full, pouty lips; bleached-blond hair; and impossibly long legs. Yet the walk down the runway — often squeezed into a ladies’ size 10 shoe — hasn’t always been a smooth and glamour-ridden one.

Bosnian-born Pejic grew up as the younger son to a single mother of two. He spent most of his childhood in a Serbian refugee camp before moving to Melbourne, Australia. While others are quick to attach labels to Pejic — he’s been referred to in the media everywhere from “James Blond” to “gender bender” to “femiman” — androgynous sensation Pejic isn’t so quick to constrict himself to a particular description… [continued]

I don’t think there should be an “acceptable” way to dress or to present yourself according to your gender, so I think it’s pretty awesome that Andrej Pejic has taken the fashion world by storm. As I mention in the linked article, however, visibility can only do so much to counter the existing gender binary, and let’s not forget that profit interests are the reason why Pejic’s strutting down the runway.

In fact, rather than subverting norms, might this trend in gender ambiguity reinforce them? Pejic’s look is first and foremost a source of profit for the agency and designers who employ him. There’s a big difference between appearing androgynous and being trans or gender-queer, but a fashion spread is not going to articulate all those nuances, nor does it even touch upon the kinds of prejudice or outright violence that many trans folks encounter because of the way they dress. Your average 20-year-old transgender person is not a highly sought after model, yet they’re the ones who aren’t insulated from harassment, discrimination, and physical violence. That isn’t to say that Pejic doesn’t encounter ignorance as well, but he enjoys some economic insulation, which shouldn’t be underestimated. Employment is a privilege that many trans people can’t count on (since gender identity and expression aren’t constitutionally protected rights). All in all, I have my doubts about whether this trend actually challenge mainstream ideas about beauty and gender or if it merely fetishizes androgyny.

“He Came To Stay” | Explosion Proof Fall 2011 Forgot to blog...

Mon, 13 Feb 2012 01:28:33 +0100

“He Came To Stay” | Explosion Proof Fall 2011

Forgot to blog this when it came out last fall, but here’s a personal essay I wrote about my relationship with Patrick (for Explosion Proof’s “State of the Union” issue). Simone de Beauvoir inspired the title. I was reading Tête-à-Tête at the time.

(To read the article, click to the individual page and right-click “view image”).

Join me and XOXOSMS for Virtual V-Day! In an LDR? Totally...

Wed, 08 Feb 2012 20:46:15 +0100

Join me and XOXOSMS for Virtual V-Day!

In an LDR? Totally bummed you can’t snuggle up to your sweet this Valentine’s Day? We’ve got something just for you! On Februrary 14th at 6pm EST, join us for the premiere of xoxosms followed by a panel about love, intimacy, sex, and the Internet (all of our favorite things!).

This is a date night for the 21st Century: fire up Skype (or gchat or oovoo!), connect with your beloved, and tune into the film together. Then stick around to have a conversation about how technology is changing the way we live and love. Panelists include director Nancy Schwartzman, Lena Chen of “Sex and The Ivy”, Twanna Hines aka “Funky Brown Chick”, writer for Ebony and Glamour, Melissa Gira Grant of The Guardian and The New York Observer, Samhita Mukhopodyay, Editor of Feministing.com, and Melanie Wallner from student focused online dating platform DateMySchool.com.

Save the date!

(I’ll be in NYC this Friday through Valentine’s Day. Join me online for the livestream!)

10 Myths About Sex and Virginity - Debunked

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 20:02:05 +0100

10 Myths About Sex and Virginity - Debunked:

So glad to see that people are still talking about this! Over at lipstick-feminists, a reader submitted a piece by the fab Lori Adelman about some takeaway points from the Rethinking Virginity Conference I organized back in 2010. Lori wrote:

The conference was organized by Lena Chen and the Harvard Queer Students’ Association, and brought together an incredibly diverse and impressive group of feminists, who dropped some serious knowledge on all things virgin-themed. One of the most interesting parts of the panel was learning how much misinformation exists around issues of virginity, sex, and our bodies. I’ve compiled ten myths uncovered- and debunked- at yesterday’s conference.

Virginity is a topic I’ve written a ton about - and to be honest, after spending a year researching it for my thesis, I’ve had to take a bit of a break from the subject. But I think Lori’s piece was such a great summation of the discussion that I had to repost! If you’re interested in learning about how virginity relates to slut-shaming, the institution of marriage, queer sexuality, and ideas about the hymen and female anatomy, … seriously, read it.

where is your line? | Lena Chen: Badass Activist Friday! The...

Fri, 27 Jan 2012 15:00:06 +0100

where is your line? | Lena Chen: Badass Activist Friday!

The Line Campaign chatted with me for their feminist interview series. I talked about my ambivalence toward the “sexpert” label, dating while feminist, and my upcoming web series on gURL.com. Check it out!

Upcoming Speaking/Travel Dates

Sat, 21 Jan 2012 00:00:00 +0100

Upcoming Speaking/Travel Dates:

Holy crap, traveling for the past month has totally done a number on my skin, immune system, and sleep schedule. Three more days in China and then I’m off to LA for a week - yet another climate and time change. Never thought I’d be looking forward to returning to the frigid New England winter, but I’m longing for some normality (and a wardrobe change) after weeks on the road.

After I get back to Boston on the 30th, I’m going to be in proposal writing mode for the indefinite future so there will be fewer new articles and blog posts coming up. Though most of my literary output will remain private for a while, I’ll have a web series coming out soon and I’ll be doing sporadic speaking gigs. That said, I’m trying to cut down on travel and extraneous obligations, so I can spend as much time as possible in Boston and not get sick like I did last year when I was running about doing Feminist Coming Out Day. I only have half a year before my Berlin move, and I have to seriously reorganize my life to make writing and my codependent relationship with my best friend my two top priorities :)

Here’s an incomplete list of where I’ll be in upcoming months …

JANUARY 22-30
Visiting Family in Los Angeles, CA

FEBRUARY 5
Panel for Sex Week At Yale in New Haven, CT

FEBRUARY 14
Panel for XOXOSMS Internet Premiere in New York City, NY

MARCH 9-13
SXSW Interactive/Film (for Sex in the Digital Age panel) in Austin, TX

APRIL 1-3
Sex::Tech 2012 (for XOXOSMS screening and panel) in San Francisco, CA

I also have to visit LA one more time before I move to Germany (or my mother will actually kill me) and I may make it over to DC at some point, but that’s all to be determined. I was also originally supposed to do a reunion with friends in New Orleans in early March, right before SXSW, but sadly, I don’t think I can afford that at the moment. (Unless someone wants to fly me over to speak, pretty please?)

Due to lack of time/money/energy, I don’t think I’ll be adding much more to my plate this spring, but as always, shoot me an email if you’re interested in hosting me as a speaker. I’ll update the above list as details get solidified (there’s a few Harvard events and some local stuff I’m still getting confirmation on). Also, for everyone who’s been inundating my inbox, I’ll be back in civilization this weekend and hope to have a handle on late emails by next week.

Now … it’s time to end this Asia trip on a high note! It’s right before Chinese New Year, and I can think of no better place to start the Year of the Dragon than in Shanghai :)

How The Internet Changed My Sex Life | Audrey Magazine I was a...

Wed, 30 Nov 2011 20:02:06 +0100

How The Internet Changed My Sex Life | Audrey Magazine

I was a guest columnist for Audrey Magazine’s Fall 2011 issue. Here’s a snippet of my piece on how online dating has altered the way we choose partners:

With the array of choices online, it’s tempting to rely on search features that comb through user databases to spit out results based on age, ethnicity, religion, education and even dietary preferences. The criteria with which you can assess potential partners range from the trivial (pet ownership status) to the maddeningly obscure (foreign languages spoken). Should a romantic decision really come down to whether someone is more of a dog person or a cat person? The Internet can make dating seem like an interview process. It’s easy to get caught up in looking for the next best thing or to falsely believe that you don’t need to compromise on your vision of an ideal partner or relation- ship, because there’s always that elusive better offer.

In this day and age, what happens virtually isn’t distinct from “the real world”; it’s part of it. I think OkCupid, Grindr, and similar services can be really fantastic ways to meet people (as long as you don’t get addicted, as SO many of my friends have). I know plenty of folks who have turned online flirtations into offline relationships, but just as many who end up in unfulfilling cycles of serial dating.

The article’s not up on the magazine’s website yet, but my editor just sent the PDF to me. To read the whole thing, click here.

Voice Of Russia | Violence Against Female Bloggers

Wed, 23 Nov 2011 20:21:06 +0100

Voice Of Russia | Violence Against Female Bloggers:

Following up on my post about the recent Twitter campaigns to bring awareness to gendered cyber harassment, here’s a link to a radio segment I did on the topic as part of Jamila Bey’s SPAR (Sex, Politics, and Religion) show, airing on Voice of Russia’s American outlet (AM 1390 in DC / AM 1430 in NYC). Rebecca Watson, the founder of Skepchick and co-host of the Skeptics Guide to the Universe, was also a guest on the show. Rebecca discussed her own experiences with online harassment, which included a troll who was eventually arrested for making death threats against her.

Check out the audio recording of the show at the link above.

For related posts on online harassment, check out the “haterade” tag on TheChicktionary.com

The Girls' State Of The Union Video Contest

Tue, 22 Nov 2011 16:06:00 +0100

The Girls' State Of The Union Video Contest:

UPDATE: The Women’s Media Center has extended the deadline for its Girls’ State Of The Union contest to December 12th.

The Women’s Media Center invites girls from all over the United States, ages 14-22, to create a 1-5 minute Girls’ State of the Union video in response to the President’s speech. Like the President’s report, the Girls’ State of the Union will sum up the condition of the country—with special emphasis on the welfare of girls—and an outline of what the President’s legislative agenda and priorities for congress should be.

Five finalists will be highlighted on the Women’s Media Center’s YouTube channel and a group of diverse and talented celebrity and new media influencer judges (including yours truly) will choose the winner. The winner, along with her parents or guardians, will be flown to Washington, DC to present her State of the Union report at the National Press Club in January. For more details on how to enter, check out the official webpage.

Don’t forget that I’m also judging the Feminist Flash Fiction contest over at MookyChick. The prize is £100 and a one-year subscription to BUST Magazine for the writer of the best submission under 200 words. Think: haiku, six-word memoir, etc. Just make it short and sweet. Best part? You can enter more than once!

Good luck, and please reblog and spread the word widely :)

Bedsider.org Is Here For All Your Contraceptive Needs

Mon, 21 Nov 2011 22:35:05 +0100

Bedsider.org Is Here For All Your Contraceptive Needs:

As many of you know, the National Campaign To Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy has been a client of mine for the past two years. Today, they are launching Bedsider.org, and I’m SUPER EXCITED to introduce such a relatable and valuable resource to you guys. Given the litany of contraceptive options out there, it can be intimidating to navigate those waters on your own. Birth control is one of the number one topics that I get questions about. I hope that Bedsider will offer the answers I can’t, while allowing you to hear from real users themselves.

In coming weeks, the National Campaign, in collaboration with the Ad Council, will distribute Bedsider PSAs to more than 33,000 media outlets (in television, radio, print, and web) as part of the first-ever multimedia public service campaign aimed at addressing unplanned pregnancy among young women in America. Bedsider, a comprehensive online and mobile program, helps sexually active women 18-24 find the right birth control method for them and use it carefully and consistently in an effort to prevent unplanned pregnancy. At Bedsider, visitors can explore, compare, and contrast all available methods of contraception, set up birth control and appointment reminders, view videos of their peers discussing personal experiences, and view animated shorts that debunk myths about birth control.

Some of my previous writing for SexReally has already begun appearing on the Bedsider blog. I can’t wait to share the new ways I’ll be working with them in the months to come :)

The Daily Beast | The Reality Of Misogyny Online

Sun, 20 Nov 2011 23:23:59 +0100

The Daily Beast | The Reality Of Misogyny Online:

It’s been an eventful week for the targets of online misogyny. Just a few days ago, bloggers began tweeting under the hashtag #ThreatOfTheDay to bring awareness to the violent threats and harassment they face everyday on the Internet. Yesterday, Sady Doyle at Tiger Beatdown wrote about how she was completely blindsided by the extent of the sexism she encountered as a woman blogger:

What I got, friends, were comments. Comments about myself. And blogs about myself. And message-board discussions, also about myself. And e-mails. What I got was what every woman (feminist or not) and openly anti-sexist person (woman or not) on this our Internet gets: I got targeted. With threats, with insults, with smear campaigns, with attempts to threaten my employment or credibility or just general ability to get through the day with a healthy attitude and a minimal amount of insult.

She proposed a Twitter campaign using the hashtag #MenCallMeThings. (And if you click on that link, you’ll see some pretty alarming examples of how far we’ve got to go.) Though I’d agree there’s an undeniably gendered nature to many of these attacks, I find it somewhat limiting that men are being called out as perpetrators and women considered their victims. Jessica Bennett at The Daily Beast wrote a story a few days ago about how misogyny plays out on the Internet, using pro-rape Facebook pages as an example. Having received a wide range of insults (based on my race, education, gender, sexual history, etc.) in wide range of forums (email, my comments’ section, anonymous message boards, hate blogs devoted to me), I can attest that gender is not the only component at play, though it has a significant role. According to my experience and social science, the overwhelming majority of online harassers are straight, white, cisgender men, but their victims run the gamut, though they tend to be people of color, queer people, women — in other words, those who are already part of socially marginalized groups. For example, I know many men who have been called pretty nasty things by other men because of their sexual orientation, race, political views, or gender identity. If you don’t abide by the rules of the “in-group”, you’re game for attack.

I take free speech seriously, so this is not just a case of some sensitive chicks not being able to take criticism. I deal with a lot of pearl-clutching and finger-wagging in my line of work, and I don’t expect most conservative people to agree with my views or my lifestyle. This isn’t about moral judgment, but something far more sinister. The type of people who call you “Asian human garbage” or tell you to “enjoy getting fired” are not god-fearing virginity pledgers who just want you to denounce your sinful ways and accept Jesus into your life*. Trolls are not interested in your immortal soul, and they’re not even really interested in voicing an opinion. Their mission is a very specific and scary one: to tear you down however they can, not simply because they want you to know that you are wrong, but because they want to make it impossible for you to keep doing what you’re doing.

In my case, it’s clear they want to force me offline. Why else would they go from attacking me and my family/friends/partner to defaming those who read my blog or “like” my Facebook status updates? The fallout is not inconsequential. Some people are, in fact, scared off the web. (Remember the Kathy Sierra incident?) Others, like me, simply start to self-censor or roll back their “public face”, often at a professional disadvantage. There’s no framework in place to identify or punish those who use the Internet to stalk, harass, and intimidate, so the impetus is on the victims to do something about it. Is a Twitter campaign going to put an end to cyber attacks and defamation? Unlikely, since I’m sure the perpetrators are well-aware that they’re engaging in questionably moral behavior. My hope is that media coverage and public attention of this issue will mitigate damage toward victims’ reputations and that reasonable people will think twice before they believe what they read on the Internet.

* And yes, these are actual comments I’ve gotten.

Related posts on online harassment:

Slut-Shaming In Action: A Warning To Readers
Cyber-Bullying & Slut-Shaming: A Cautionary Tale
Reader Question: “Why Do You Think You Have So Many Haters?”
This Is What Slut-Shaming Looks Like

Have you encountered harassment online? Tweet it with the hashtag #mencallmethings and #threatoftheday or leave it in the comments below. Please use a pseudonym for your own protection.

MookyChick's Feminist Flash 2011 Competition

Mon, 31 Oct 2011 21:36:18 +0100

MookyChick's Feminist Flash 2011 Competition:

I’m judging an awesome writing contest over at MookyChick, a UK-based alternative women’s site. (You might remember this interview they did with me last month.) It’s easy to enter — the maximum word length for each entry is 200 words — and there’s a cash prize (as well as a feministy one) involved. Here are the details:

Slut shaming. Contraception. Body dysmorphia. Ladette culture. Impossible Disney princesses. The glass ceiling for women in everything from banking to comedy. Acid attacks in S Asia. Systematic rape in Sierra Leone. FGM. Saudi women permitted to vote but not drive themselves to the polling station. Being told it’s, uh, you know, dude, a little bit uncool to call yourself a feminist. Feminism is prevalent in all aspects of society and affects, ooh, pretty much 100% of the population!

To promote feminism in writing, Mookychick is proud to announce a new annual writing competition, FEMINIST FLASH 2011. It’s dead easy to enter, and you should. Right now! Channel your inner Dorothy Parker / Caitlin Moran / Margaret Atwood / Naomi Wolfe and you’ll win wealth, fame and a 1 year digital subscription to BUST Magazine.

The first-prize winner of the best haiku, poem or flash fiction (under 200 words) receives:

£100 (or your country’s equivalent)
Publication with a link to your blog on Mookychick
1 Year digital subscription to the fabled Bust magazine!

Entries accepted until November 30, 2011. Check out the runner-up prizes and full instructions on how to enter at MookyChick!

Tell your feminist writer pals and please reblog to spread the word :)

Vote for College Candy's Most Influential Women

Mon, 24 Oct 2011 23:19:00 +0200

Vote for College Candy's Most Influential Women:

Happy Monday! I’m nominated for Most Influential Female Blogger over at College Candy. Check out all the nominees in the different categories and fill out a survey of who you think represents the best of the best — everyone who votes gets entered to win a prize from Rent The Runway :)