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Dealbreaker: He’s Got an Asian Fetish | GOOD
Here’s an essay I wrote for GOOD Magazine about a very political issue that wields its head in my personal life. A snippet below:
By the time I met Pierre, I’d already encountered countless fetishists trying to score submissive mates or a membership in the Joy Fuck Club. What’s more, I thought I knew how to avoid these guys—the kind of men who said they were looking for “Asian princesses” in their dating profiles, who expected me to walk on their backs one night and wield a wok the next.
But I soon learned that while a negative bias against a minority group is fairly easy to identify, a fetish can be much trickier to detect and dissect. Are attempts to speak Mandarin just misguided efforts to impress me, a non-native speaker? Should I be flattered when a guy compares me to Lucy Liu, an Asian actress to whom I bear little resemblance? Is being attracted to a woman for her race really any more offensive than dating her for her looks? Unlike sexually transmitted infections, there’s no test for yellow fever, and a fetishist is rarely inclined to disclose the affliction.
Click over for the full piece.
Asian American Awareness Week: Interracial Dating Panel
Thanks to everyone who made the panel! Here’s the blurb for those who missed it:
Asian American Awareness Week: Interracial Dating Panel
Lowell House Junior Common Room, 4:30-6:00pm
Sponsored by HAPA and SAA, this event will feature 6 discussion leaders who will share some of their experiences and reflections before we break into groups to discuss anything and everything about interracial dating.
At a school as diverse as Harvard, interracial dating is quite common. Do you think there are benefits to dating outside your race? Are their drawbacks? How do various groups within the Asian community reconcile historical or political stereotypes and prejudices with interracial dating? What will your friends and family think? Or is it not different at all? What’s the deal with “yellow fever?”
Come and discuss these questions and more while enjoying some delicious Finale’s cakes and pastries!
Asian American Awareness Week: Female Sexuality Panel
Tonight, I was a panelist at an event for Asian American Awareness Week at Harvard University. I wrote up a dispatch on The Chicktionary recounting some of the topics of discussion:
“I attributed the image of the meek, submissive Asian woman to the history of Western colonization and occupation in the East, where forced and “voluntary” sex trade was rampant. Since the majority of encounters were transactional, women occupied subservient roles. Prostitution aside, interactions between Asian women and male foreigners nonetheless tended to be inherently unequal due to the economic privilege of the latter group.“
[more]
Some of the topics we discussed, from familial expectations to stereotypes and fetishes, will hopefully be addressed in greater detail when I’m a panelist at Friday’s Interracial Dating Discussion, which takes place at 4:30pm in Lowell House’s Junior Common Room. It’s a topic to which I’ve devoted plenty of ink, so I welcome the opportunity to hold another audience hostage while I ramble away.
Eating In | The Harvard Crimson
A postcard to The Crimson on cooking Chinese food in Germany:
OSNABRÜCK, Germany — I started cooking last year after I moved off-campus to live with my boyfriend, who has an actual kitchen and uses it to make exactly three varieties of salad. When I decided that it was time for us to incorporate heat into our kitchen regimen, my mother saw it as a long-awaited opportunity to instruct me in Chinese cooking. [more]
Pacific Ties | The Dialogue Issue: "Blogosphere: The New Frontier?"

The latest edition of Pacific Ties, UCLA’s Asian American Pacific Islander newsmagazine features a cover story on bloggers, written by my friend Evelina, who was my co-editor-in-chief in high school. (Congrats!)
The blogs covered include:
All of the above sites are worth checking out if you want to learn more about AAPI issues. I actually met the Disgrasian girls last spring in Boston when they were speaking at Harvard, and they’re really insightful and funny (pretty much exactly how they come off on their blog — minus the snark).
The Dialogue Issue of Pacific Ties is available now at UCLA newsstands and by request (just shoot an email to pacties@media.ucla.edu for a free copy). The entire issue can be read online here.
Asian American Women In Leadership Conference (AAWIL) | ASPIRE (Asian Sisters Participating In Reaching Excellence)
Thrilled to be speaking on a panel at this conference!
“Family, Cultural and Community Influences”
Our family, cultural background and our community influence and shape our perception of the world and our ability to achieve. Whether spoken or unspoken, these views of achievement play into how we see ourselves as leaders. Cross generational panelists will share their experiences of how their families, cultural upbringing, and immediate communities have made them who they are today.
Panelists:
Lena Chen, Blogger and Freelance Writer, Junior at Harvard University
Thelma Kailiwai, Staff Director of Strategic Development, Integrated Defense Systems Engineering, Raytheon
Becky Lee, Former Survivor Contestant & Attorney, Founder of Becky Lee Women’s Support Fund
Amy Tsai-Chae, Candidate for PhD in Psychology, University of Michigan
Jennifer Chow (Moderator), Manager of Outreach and Enrollment, Health Care For All
Check out the full agenda here!